Having just signed Noah up for his first season of Little League, reading this article brings a tear to my eye. I highly recommend it to you:

FIRST-PERSON: Pitchers and catchers report — will Dads?

Photo by Brandon Robbins

People know where to go online if they want to see pornography. They know exactly where to look, and they can pull it up even on their cell phone in a discreet moment, if that is what they desire. They are also well aware of how to cover their steps by deleting browsing histories, cookies, and the like.

Porn is like a drug, in the sense that many people plan their days around when they intend to inhale the images on the screen.

It is almost like American Culture is a giant pool of hot tar, and in such a place, everyone is going to get burned sooner or later. Even for youth and children, there is nowhere to run and hide where the prostitute of Proverbs 5-6 is not knocking at the door.

Proverbs 5:3-9 For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.  Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol; she does not ponder the path of life; her ways wander, and she does not know it. And now, O sons, listen to me, and do not depart from the words of my mouth. Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house.

In such a culture, people who desire sexual purity for the holiness and glory of God are simply not at home. Walking down the mall, driving down the interstate, or clicking on prime time tv, is all one must do to be saturated with sexually suggestive images, communicating the idea that if you are not being satisfied at home, there are plenty of other places you can turn.

The statistics of people who regularly view porn, or read romance novels (porn for women), are overwhelming. The vast majority of men and women, including those who claim the name of Jesus, are seeking out sexual promiscuity in some form or the other, and are not satisfied with God’s plan for pure sexual expression within marriage. Tim Challies recently wrote:

“I read recently of a researcher who wanted to study the effects of pornography on young adult males. He carefully built the structure for the study, determining how he would compare young men who had experienced pornography with a control group comprised of those who had never come into contact it. Tragically this researcher had to cancel his study. He found that he was unable to put together a control group; he could not find young men who had not discovered pornography. The experiment was impossible to conduct.”

The vast majority of teens have been exposed dozens of times to hard core pornography, and in many cases, participate in it with each other.

Given the gravity of sexual sin, even among the Church, I thought it would be fitting to put together a list of free, online resources to help those who want a way out. (AND THERE IS A WAY OUT)! These are the best online works I have found on the issue, and I highly recommend them. It is nice to know that help can be found online, just like harm can be found online.

By way of application, I would suggest reading these writings constantly, praying through them. Perhaps, reading them with a trusted friend can lead to greater accountability.

Ultimately, the reason we engage in sexual sin is because we are not satisfied with the glory and goodness of God. Falling deeper in love with Him, and desiring to live life in the way He has designed it, are the proper positive ways to squelch out sexual sin in our lives.

SERMONS

Fireproof Marriage by Pastor Brian Branam

Let Him Kiss Me by Mark Driscoll

Desiring God National Conference: Sex and the Supremacy of God (Piper, Mohler, Dever and others)

This is the Will of God for You: That You Abstain from Sexual Immorality by John Piper

ONLINE BOOKS

Sex and the Supremacy of God by John Piper and others

Sexual Detox by Tim Challies

Porn Again Christian by Mark Driscoll

ARTICLES

Wired for Intimacy by Tim Challies

When Unclothed Is Unfitting by John Piper

WEBSITES

New Life Ministries

Pure Heart, Pure Mind

Covenant Eyes

Net Nanny

D.A. Carson is a well respected theologian. His work as Research Professor at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School has been monumental, climaxing in a number of important books and articles. I have learned much from Dr. Carson, but I most admire him for his devotional edge. By this, I mean he seems to genuinely love God! It is sometimes easy for those in the “theology profession” to say many things about God in a broken, unattached (no horse in the race), kind of way. Carson has avoided this error and the short editorial below is one line of evidence that this is the case. I hope you read it.

Most of us have had the experience of drifting, half awake and half asleep, in a gray mist of semi-consciousness, only to be jerked fully awake by some sudden and vivid memory of a shameful thing we have done or said in the past. The action or words are terribly vivid, and we break out in a cold sweat of shame. An inner writhing makes us wish we could relive those moments and behave differently. But in the immortal words of Omar Khayyam,

The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it.

What is striking about these experiences is that the acute shame we suddenly feel is almost invariably with reference to a horizontal relationship—that is, we feel shame for what we have said or done that has wounded a friend or diminished us in the eyes of a family member or colleague. Almost never do we feel such acute shame before God. Why is this?

I suspect that at least one of the reasons is that many of us care rather more for what fellow human beings think of us than for what God thinks of us. To put this in theological language, we do not fall under adequate conviction of sin—conviction that simultaneously makes us feel guilty because we are guilty, and makes us ashamed because we have been so profoundly disloyal to our Maker and Sovereign. What he thinks of us when we act or speak despicably ought to be far more important to us than what anyone else thinks of us. That it is not usually so is itself a measure of our estrangement from the living God.

This common experience of God’s fallen image-bearers, people like you and me, takes on particular hues in specific disciplines. That is why it is worth asking readers of this digital journal what it is that is most likely to induce a sense of shame or embarrassment among theologians young and old, among pastors and teachers.

Would it be unduly cynical of me to suggest that most of us are more likely to feel troubled by something we have said or done that has upset a colleague or parishioner than by something that has dishonored God? Some do not want to be too closely associated with anything the scholarly guild judges old-fashioned or fundamentalist: that, surely, would be shameful. On the other hand, Jesus says some blunt things about those who are ashamed of him and his words (Mark 8:38). The question resolves into something pretty straightforward: Whose approval do we most earnestly desire? Whose approval do we want when we prepare for a lecture (whether to deliver it or to learn from it)? Whose approval do we seek when we preach a sermon? Whose approval matters most when we write a paper or slog away at a dissertation? Whose approval do we hunger for when we choose a vocation, decide how to use our time, take pains to build links of affection and accountability in the local church, exercise, bring up our children, nurture our families, read, lead a Bible study, help a neighbor?

If we do not want God’s approval the most, where does idolatry begin?

Mind you, the really wonderful thing about occasional midnight writhings when the person we have most offended is God is that this God also provides everything that is necessary to cleanse our conscience so that we may once again look boldly into his face. He is “faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). So we return to the cross, and rest once again.

A few weeks ago, I suggested that you listen to Brian Branam’s series of sermons called Smart Marriage. I know that some of you have been following along. There are two sermons that all of us need to hear, and I want to strongly recommend you take some time to listen to them. Both men and women should listen to both sermons. Here are the links:

Be a Man

Be a Woman